Pale Horse

I didn’t realize for a long time, like way longer than your might think, that not everyone heard voices. I mean, you’d think I would have picked up on that. Like, I knew that I could hear mine, and other people couldn’t, but it never occurred to me that other people didn’t have their own that they could hear and I couldn’t.

I don’t talk about my voices. I mean, I admit to them, but I don’t talk about what they say. That’s over now. I get very upset by what I hear which is weird ‘cause I don’t think other people would be upset by hearing the same things.

One voice I hear pretty clearly. It’s generally asking me questions. It asks me about horses fairly regularly. “What about the horses?” This is very annoying. It’s not very upsetting. The other voice is not very clear. It says things like “no” and my name a lot. It says a lot of other things I don’t really catch, like I hear it but not quite. Like, I want to ask it to repeat itself but I think that’s the idea, so I don’t.

The second voice is very upsetting. It’s distracting, it makes me feel panicky and raises my heart rate to where I can feel it so I get to worrying if I’m going to have problems with my heart again which makes me more upset.

Here’s a horse.
Here’s a pale horse.